SOA-spreekuur - 22 augustus 2008
De telefoon. Student aan de lijn. Begint hakkelend te praten over de GGD, SOA en het facilitair bedrijf (FB). Ik snap er geen ruk van en ga over in de vragen-modus. Hoe heet je? Wat wil je van ons? Waarom dan? Wanneer dan? Waar dan? Oftewel: Gestapotechnieken. Ik begrijp het volgende: een student loopt stage bij de GGD en haar opdracht is uitzoeken of de GGD een SOA-spreekuur op Windesheim kan te houden. Animo genoeg, nu alleen nog een geschikte ruimte. En daar kom ik dan in beeld. Via het FB heeft ze vernomen dat wij (van de School of Heath Care) wel een geschikte ruimte zouden hebben. Grappenmakers daar bij het FB.
Zie je het voor je? Een krabbende puber op de gang, zich dood generend. Verscholen onder een grote baseball-cap en dito zonnebril. Schuchter wachtend totdat de GGD-arts de deur openzwaait en net iets te hard roept : Sander? Terwijl net op dat moment de klasgenootjes van Sander langs lopen en het in de broek doen van het lachen? Dat Sanders’ reputatie voorgoed is geschaad, gedood, begraven, verteerd? Dat de sexuele revolutie waar Sander vanaf HAVO 3 van had gedroomd in dat ogenblik in vlammen opgaat.
Zie je het voor je? Dat Moniek en Anneloes samen op het wachtbankje zitten. Dat ze aan de praat raken. Dat ze erachter komen dat de vriend van Moniek vreemd gegaan is met Anneloes. Maar niet voordat Anneloes iets met Hans had gedaan. En dat het dus Anneloes d’r schuld is dat Moniek al dagen niet normaal naar het toilet kan. Dat het begint met wat stevige woorden en dat het pas eindigt als Hans de Huismeester de twee dames hardhandig uit elkaar moet halen.
Zie je het voor je? Dat Pieter, de docent Politicologie zenuwachtig ijsbeert op de gang. Dat je denkt, die werkt helemaal niet op deze vleugel. Dat dan het kwartje valt. Dat Pieter ineens in een heel ander daglicht komt te staan. Dat je Pieter checkt op portaal en bij jezelf denkt, even een grapje uithalen. Dat je vervolgens een enveloppe voor interne post pakt en deze volstouwt met print-out over hepatitis, chlamydia, genitale wratten en gonorroe. Dat je later hoort dat Pieter overspannen thuis zit.
Nee, echt enthousiast over een SOA-spreekuur op onze afdeling ben ik nog niet. Ik vind het wel een geweldig initiatief, maar not in my back yard. Ze zouden een rustig, afgelegen plekje moeten vinden. Ergens waar nooit iemand komt. Hoe zit dat eigenlijk met die gebedsruimte?
broer - 25 augustus 2008
Dirk, je hebt het nog niet gehoord zeker? een SOA is de nieuwe IPod, de absolute Must Have. Dit is DE manier om aan te tonen dat je niet alleen virtueel leeft. Dat ze dit bij jou op de afdeling willen brengen komt doordat de Gezellige Dametjes er zeker voor zullen zorgen dat deze info binnen no time bekend is op het schoolplein.
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